Thursday, June 14, 2007

Nicholas Cage causes extinction of all life on earth

I have figured it out. While all the experts are clueless as to why the bees are disappearing, I have singlehandedly discovered the reason. Why are they gone? Where are there? What happened? They are on strike after being forced to participate in possibly the worst movie ever to be made. It is called The Wickerman, it stars Nicholas Cage, it's a remake of a cult film from the '70s, and it is full of bees. Bees everywhere, in almost every scene, forced to witness hour after hour of agonizing acting, forced to play bit roles while buffoons bumble through dialogue worthy of bad porn, and forced to appear in a movie that doesn't include even one boob shot despite being set on an island run by hot chicks. How bad is it? See for yourself (and then blame Nicholas Cage for the murder of 6 billion people):


Anonymous said...

Don't forget "My Girl" with Macaulay Culkin and that highly-illegal at the time but sexy for some reason little girl... Anna Chlumsky. Shit she's legal now!

Anyways, the fuckin' bees killed, brutally killed, little Macaulay...

What time is dinner dad?

Ghost Rider said...

regarding the comment above, GOOD!