Thursday, December 20, 2007

Happy Holidays

Happy holidays! Hey, look what I got you! It's a disgusting bee ornament! Well, not really a bee. It's a person thing with a yellow dishrag on her head, wearing a bee dress, black and white stockings and elf shoes. She does have wings though, so maybe she is some sort of bee-themed fairy. She's also holding onto a bee-colored umbrella and making some weird puffing face. She's actually pretty frightening. Imagine if someone rang your doorbell and you opened the door and a life-size version of this was just standing there, silently puffing away. But anyway, Merry Christmas, fuckface.

Nice thorax

Wow, this bee has a HUGE ass. I mean, if you're down with that kind of thing, this has to be just another reason to care about saving the bees. Of course nobody does. No one cares. People are happy to let the bees die. And this blog. One one reads it. It doesn't matter. The bees don't mean shit. Fine. Let it all go. Let it all rot. You don't want some fat hot sexy bee ass? Fine with me. You want to sit idly by reading Perez Hilton while the food chain breaks down? Go for it. Happy holidays, assholes.

Wednesday, December 5, 2007

Bee beats beetle

As recently reported by the BBC, a bee was seen battling a beetle in Bristol. Apparently, the bee beat the beetle, but barely. Despite putting up a brave bit of boxing in the bout, the brunt of the beetle's blows were beaten back by the bee's brutal bites. The backwash of the bee-beetle brouhaha was beneficial to the bountiful bourgeois, for the big bee blight has been bringing bulletins of badnes and bereavement. Bonjour, bitches.

Tuesday, December 4, 2007

Let's bee friends

Hello bee lovers. It's been a while? Why? Because I have been distraught. I have been lying on the floor in a pile of my own filth and tears, wallowing in misery, because, despite coverage on 60 Minutes, nobody cares about the bees. Oh, woe is bee, woe is bee! Yet, at the moment of my greatest despair, someone knocked upon my virtual door, entered my sanctum of sadness, and lifted me up out of the doldrums. Who is this person? Janine. What does she do? Loves bees. LOVES BEES! You hear that bee lovers? We are not alone! For Janine runs the mighty blog Temple of Sting where she too wails about the dying bees, the inaccuracies of the mass beedia and other bee-related topics. Yes, she seems to occasionally post about Sufjan Stevens and other things that are not bees, but overall Janine is a bee-blogging hero. Gaze upon her glorious bee socks (actually not hers) and rejoice!