Tuesday, January 29, 2008

Planet bee? Not for long at this rate.

Out of sight out of mind, that's the American way right. You have a problem, it makes headlines for a few days or maybe even weeks, but eventually we get bored and then it goes away, even if the problem itself doesn't. Well guess what — the bee problem isn't going away, but the bees are. Just look at this: bee death problems and France and Italy. Oh, the problem isn't gone, even thought our attention spans are. You think we live on a bee planet? Well, we do. A planet run on bees. But they're not laughing. They're not smiling. They're dying! Dying, you stupid careless fucks! And the rest of us will follow soon along with the entire food chain if we don't do something about it! But nooooooo, what's on Entertainment Tonight? What's on E? What's on Perez Hilton? That's all you care about, you selfish fuckers. You don't deserve what the bees give you! They work hard all day, all night, all mid morning, while you're sitting on your fat fleshy ass surfing the web and planning your time share, and all they ask for is a little concern when they're experiencing a mystery holocaust that's probably your fault to begin with. But that's too much. One precious second of your shriveled brain's time is just not available, even if it means the death of all life on Earth. Enjoy your planet now while you still can, you bloody wankers.

Thursday, January 24, 2008

These boots are made for the apocalypse

Hey bee-lovers. It's been a while since the last update, but here's some major news for you: all the bees are going to die and we're still as fucked as ever. Yup, nothing much has changed. The world is going to end, the economy is collapsing, the food chain is being dismantled, and guess what - still no bees. And nobody cares. Yeah, sure, put on your little bee boots and run around! Do a little dance! HEY LOOK AT ME AND MY BEE BOOTS! THEY'VE GOT LITTLE EYES AND LITTLE WINGS, JUST LIKE REAL BEES!!! And just like the real bees of today, they're inanimate objects that can't do anything — like make apples or corn or other food products that stupid boot wearing bastards like us need. Laugh it up boot people. Stick your feet knee-deep in the pits of your own doom.