Thursday, September 6, 2007
You bee old
You know why this whole bee death thing is crazy? Because we've been living with bees for so long. They've been our friends and helpers for literally thousands of years, and now all of a sudden, dead. All dead! Just look here, it says beekeeping has been going on for more than 3,000 years! They just found some beehive fossils or whatever down in Jerusalem! That means beekeeping is old! So old that beekeepers would ride dinosaurs to work. When they rode cars they had to run like in the Flintstones. I mean, I don't mean no disrespect, you know, all I'm sayin is that your beekeeper is so old, her memory is in black and white. Your beekeeper is so old, Jurassic Park brought back memories. Your beekeeper is so old, she hides her own Easter eggs. Yo beekeeper is so old, I told her to act her age and she died. Yo beekeeper is so old she has hieroglyphics on her driver's license. Her social security number is 1. Her yearbook picture is right next to Moses. Yo beekeeper is so old, when the police asked her for her ID she gave them a rock. When she was in school, there was no history class. When God said "let there be light," she flicked the switch. Yo beekeeper is so old, her birthday expired. She needs a 200-foot birthday cake just to fit the candles. Yo beekeeper is so old, she has been taking care of bees years and making a live off selling honey and renting out hives to pollinate crops and she's really good at and is considered a consummate professional by most people who know her.