Monday, December 13, 2010

This is it: Caught red-handed!

You motherfuckers! I knew it all along! It was a conspiracy! Or a stupidity! Or a conspiracy of stupidty! Either way, the proof is in the pudding, the sweet, sweet pudding:
"A leaked EPA document reveals that the agency allowed the widespread use of a bee-toxic pesticide, despite warnings from EPA scientists."
They knew, but they didn't care. Surprise surprise. "Oh, this stuff kills bees? Well, it also kills other bugs so fuck it, let's just spray away. I mean, so what if a few bees take a hit. Big deal. It's not like we're going to set off some huge mass die-off, right guys?! HAHAHA!" And then they all stripped naked and went swimming in their lobbyist money.
I think the best part of this whole story is that even now that the information is leaked and it turns out that this chemical is banned in many parts of Europe, we're still going to keep using it here. Because that's what we do in this rotten, greedy country devoid of any meaningful culture. We just make a profit. But it's all coming home to roost, or to sting. A fat bank account won't mean shit when the bees are all dead and there's nothing to eat. Maybe then we can force all these pesticide assholes and corrupt government regulators to dress up in bee costumes and pollinate crops by hand with little eye droppers. We can have taskmasters with whips watching over them. Yeah, it will be a grand old time. Except that really we'll just all be dead.
Good times. Gotta love all this freedom.

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